I don’t know where to start…. everything is pretty messed up right now. I’m having to repeat my first year at university because I screwed up on the first attempt, some of my classmates and teachers dislike me, I have no “real” friends, I have no money (I only have a week’s supply of food left), every job I apply to turns me down, my parents don’t care about what happens to me or anyone else because their own lives are really messed up, my grandfather died last month, I haven’t been eating properly for years and have dramatically lost weight, I haven’t left the house that I’m living at for a whole week… I feel so weak, purposeless and depressed and yet, I feel guilty that I’m even writing all this down when someone out there is probably far worse than I am. Why is life so hard? It beats you up so hard that you’re left with no strength to stay positive and keep going. You question, “When will things get better?” “If only things would just get better?”
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My advice is to turn to God. Tell him your worries your burdens and your tough situations. The key thing is to communicate with him. You need to hand over your problems to him and let him make a way for you. He knows the things that you are going through, but still it is best to go to him and let him know becuase he likes to be apart of every single situation in your life.
Understand that it is not just you, there are TONS of people out there who are looking for jobs. Jobs and interviews arent what they use to be nowadays. NOw its like you go apply for a job and you end up wasting your time on the application becuase you never get called back, or you managed to get an interview but that didnt matter either. As I have stated on other threads, I have been to THREE interviews for ONE job and they literally wasted my time. I was bitter for WEEKS becuase they made me think i was actually going to get it, plus i wasted time, energy and money on a job that did not care to hire me in the first place. Then i went to another interview and was bascially screwed over becuase they thought i couldnt handle retail just becuase i hated my job in fast food. What really hurts is the fact that you spend so much time filling out applications and nobody calls you. I have lost count at how many applications i’ve filled out and it hurts like hell that it’s worth nothing!
What people have been telling me to do everytime i seek advice, is to turn to God and if I keep getting this same message, then perhaps its a very strong message. So i let go of my job hunts becuase i KNOW i did my part countless times, now its time to wait on God. a big burden has been lifted off my chest so far.
Repeating a full year of university is not as bad as repeating a year in normal school. I repeated the 7th grade beucase i literally didnt do the work, i didnt study, i didnt concentrate and i went to sleep in class all the time. Even a teacher tried to warn me about my grades but i bascially laughed it off and she looked at me very strangely. Then the next year she found me sitting in gym thinking i was in the 8th grade and bascially embarassed me in front of the class that i flunked. Do you remember the movie Clueless with Britteny Murphey in it? Well thats how i was in school, i had MANY MANY friends with boy drama and talking all day on the phones and crap and i LOVED it, i loved the attention and i loved writing notes and being invovled. I traded my education just for them and I ended up losing every single of one them the moment i flunked. as a 7th grader for the second time, i got to watch my ‘friends’ go off to the 8th grade and get treated like kings and queens, have parties, go to numerous field trips while i stay stuck with a bunch of 6th grades. I was so bitter that entire year and i felt soooooo worthless and small.
I Had NO friends
I was always alone
I cried at least every 2 weeks
wrote myself death letters
wanted to die so bad
Had a teacher that made my life a living hell and humiliated me and made me get my first referral ever. (later on she was suspended for being so rough) It was a horrible year for me. But it sure as hell was a lesson learned. You gotta put your education first!!!!!! when i got to the 8th grade, i regained ALOT of DIFFERENT friends.
If i were to repeat something at college, yea it would be a bummer but at least people don’t know who you are becuase youre in class with a mixture of people who are juniors, seniors, soph, etc. Nobody knows your status except the professors if you take them over again.
What has really worked for me by avoiding BAD professors is going to a “grade my professor” website, where students will go there and warn you on who to take and who not to take. I’ve been in college since 2006 and i have yet had a professor that was just really bad or rude. those sites REALLY freaken work!! go to this website, look up your univeristy and see if that works. http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/ don’t pay bad professors with your money, money doesnt grow on trees!
You will not have a happy life if you wont take care of yourself, so start getting smart and avoid all the bad foods. start eating healthy stuff and gain your weight back. it all starts with will-power and the choice to do it.
Yes life is VERY VERY hard, especially when you have these man-made systems that don’t do any good, such as laying people off when they fear that their money supply will drop. I was abandoned and pushed out of the job last august, i have yet to find a job so far.
Just hang in there. There are many others in your shoes.
First…Stop comparing yourself to everyone else. Those are YOUR problems, YOUR pains, you need to acknowledge that they hurt, and that they and you are very important. What you feel is very important.
If you keep pushing them back, saying that other people have it worse, it’ll get you nowhere.
You are a very important person. Never forget that. There will always be at least one person who loves you, even if you don’t know it.
Quite honestly…I’m not sure what you want to hear (or read in this case).
I don’t know if you want some harsh words, or if you want sympathy.
So, I’ll do my best to give both.
Because frankly, I care about you. I’ve never met you, but from reading what you wrote…I feel like…Like somehow, we’re connected.
Maybe it’s because I’ve gone through similar things.
For example….I used to think a lot like you. “people have it much worse”. I used to think that 24/7. Needless to say, thinking that way purged me into depression. Because of that way of thinking, I never put myself first. It wasn’t until later that I found out that it’s okay to put my happiness first. That it’s okay to think about my feelings.
I know…That…At first…It’ll truly feel like you’re being selfish, and you’ll feel guilty about it. But the truth is, it’s okay to be a little selfish sometimes. Most people will understand, even encourage it.
I know…That you might be thinking, “I can’t do that.” And you might be saying it for multiple reasons like “I don’t deserve it” or maybe “I just can’t…”
But maybe…Maybe you’re just scared. I know I was…No…I know I am. I know I’m scared of being selfish, asking for things, or for help…I know that I’m scared of being happy.
Because, If I’m happy, it may be taken away from me. Something I love may be lost to me.
Or maybe happiness won’t want me, or reject me. Maybe, one day, it’ll be there, but the next, it’ll be gone.
What if, it’s right within my reach, but as I grasp it, it disappears?
What if I get hurt?
What happens if I become a dissappointment?
The truth is….
Those are all risks you’ll have to take.
I’m still scared of taking them.
Believe me. I am.
I’m terrified of it. So much, that when it seems to even hint that it may happen, I begin to break down.
But then it doesn’t happen, or it’s not as bad as I thought.
You have to have courage.
You are brave. You are.
You have to believe in yourself.
I believe in you.
It’s hard work. But you can do. You can find your own happiness.
You must persevere and keep going.
Life hurts.
Anyone can hurt someone as long as the’re alive. But if you’re scared of that, you can’t trust anyone. Even family, even friends, there are times you hurt one another. But if you believe in eachother, you can start over again. So long as you believe in eachother, a new beginning is possible over and over again.
If you try too hard to fit in or convince yourself that you’re okay, you’ll end up building a wall where no improvement can reach. You have to believe. Yes, I know believing causes pain and suffering, but it could also bring hope and happiness.
Pain and suffering…It all truly hurts. But if you don’t speak from your heart, you’ll keep hurting. Once you let people know how you feel, that you’re hurting, they’ll listen to you. They’ll want to know more about how you feel.
No matter how much you think it, you’re not alone.
This message is extremely long. haha
If you want to talk more, you can reach me at Ibelieve_Ihope@yahoo.com.
I think 80% of everyone problems is money, if you have money you have everything like friends, love, happiness.
I think the real problem is how to get a decent job that makes you depend on yourself, cuz depending on others or expecting help from them it sucks,
you are just on your own, eventually life will get better.
try to just go on with your life, it might sound easy to me, i don’t know what you are going through, but try for yourself.